My Zodiac Sign

Who keeps an arrow in his bow, And if you prod him, lets it go? A fervent friend, a subtle foe –— Scorpio

I'm always intrigued with my zodiac sign. Call me superstitious, but I truly believe in the astronomy galaxy that works in a miraculous way of how you are born. So here is something I've come across in my junk mail. If you like to know more about Scorpio, analyze this!

>SCORPIO MAN > > >A man with a foggy clouds over him. He is sensitive and easily hurt and >always feels lonely. He does not trust anyone but himself. Sounding so >negative, but he has an amazingly charisma. He is a compassionate man . He >absorbs other people sentimental feeling and pain. > >He is a good psychiatrist and he could understand complex and confused >feeling. He has a hidden power that he could use it to make things happen >and do things well. He does not like people who never try to help themselves >before asking other people for favors. He is the type of guy who mostly >achieved his goal in life.Once he sets his mind for something, he will put >all his energy and efforts in it , whether or not it is a small matter or a >big project. One of the most success man in all the Zodiac. > >He is a very patient man and can waits for years to reach his goal. He hates >thin feeling and weak determinations. He can not retreat or rest for long, >for he thinks life has more questions and more answer to be searched. > >If he is in love, you will get plenty of love from him, sometimes may be too >much than you have asked for. He is serious about love and relationship and >will not waste time with someone he does not love whether how pretty she is. > >He hardly makes mistake. He could tell if you have any bad thought, and will >not hesitate to tell you so. If you do not like straight forward sincere >man, then pack your bag now. If you are an over sensitive person, try not to >ask for his comments. He will tell you the truth, even you might not be able >to take it. Example , if you ask him if you are fat (and you are fat), he >will say "yes, as big as a balloon". He makes such comments because he cares >for you, so do something about your weight and do not get up set with him. > >If he says "you look pretty today", you can be proud because he will not say >such think just to please you if he does not really mean it. There will be >both kind of people, those who like him and those who hate him. If you are >in love this guy, be strong and belief in your decision, do not be >vulnerable. He remembers all his anger and will wait for his pay back time. > >He is very serious about your promise, do not promise something you could >not keep. He loves his friends and will do anything for his close friends. >He likes you to take care of him, but not in front of his friend. He is a >complex man and you will never understand what he means if you do not really >know him. He is happy to know he is a complex figure. When he is thinking or >when he needs his privacy, you should give him some space. > >He memorize everything well. You may say something that you already >forgotten, but he will remember every words. He wants to be respected and >admired and at the same time he does not like people to have power over him. > >When he falls in love, he really falls deep. A man in this Zodiac once in >love, he will be sweeter than sugar. He does not like a plain and simple >woman. A complex woman's mind is his venture. Always be interesting and able >to talk to him about every things in any subjects. He does not like a woman >who sits around waiting for his call.

Sun-day

Sunday is my favorite day of the week as I told you I love my job thus I rarely have Monday blues. It’s the day where I unwind myself with a book or visiting library for new discoveries. Either magazine, friction or non-friction books, all of it delights me. I’m voracious for knowledge. From Ian Stevenson; reincarnation case study, Joestin Garner; Sophie’s world to Marie Claire UK, as long as it intrigues me, I will spend my good old Sunday letting my imagination runs wild.

As for today, I met Mary, my chum for her wedding gown fitting. I’m excited as the gown is especially designed by me. She is petite and a little on the plus size, so I’ve designed an off-shoulder strap ivory white gown to cover her less than flattering arms and low V neckline showcasing her big blossom. A touch of champagne lace as the trimming to make the gown more exquisite. Everything turns out to be perfect. Her photo shoot will be on this coming Wednesday. I’ll be working on that day; so I might not be there for her photo shoot. Let’s see if I could get a day off for she desperately needs my art direction. Who can be the perfect candidate as Beauty and Glamour is all in my blood… : )

Can't let go...

Today, I’m mourning on 2 things. One is the season finale of QAF and the other is the lost of a 15 year old friendship. As much as others see me as someone jovial, decisive and strong-minded, I do hold a penchant for holding back and not letting go.

I remember the first walkman that I purchased after receiving my first salary ($632 minus the CPF contribution, I know it feels like such a rip off after the deduction!) working as a pharmacy assistant in Guardian. I’m elated and proud of my newly bought AIWA walkman. Not until someone stole my walkman from the backstage I was performing during teacher’s day 1996. That’s where I’ve realized having attachment to people and things is too much for me to handle. It’s not about losing the walkman. It’s losing the affection that even if I bought another walkman, the feeling of using it will be different. Perhaps I could buy another identical walkman but what can I buy to substitute another friendship. I’ve heard about changes, people change and environment changes. However what I can’t tolerate is my friend misjudge me, misunderstood me, and having a certain personal expectation on me especially when he trash it out on a long list of paper and quote on my blog and interpret it on his behalf. I felt a sense of betrayal and hurt when obviously nobody knows me thus why judge. To extend this matter worse, another chum who knows him begin to start having an opinion that I’m harsh and not magnanimous. When someone chooses not to forgive, it doesn’t mean he is in the wrong. Maybe he is still hurt and not able to forgive yet. What’s more, he should seriously look deep into the matter and unravel first before he starts to judge and defend the other party.

Should I say my friend changes or I’ve evolved? I guess both play a part for the differences. What I do know is that I certainly haven’t let go and forgive…

I’m easy to get along when you don’t know me.
I’m not easy to get along when you know me.

Camel Toe

My colleague, WeiLun asked me " Do you know what is camel toe?", I replied, "No idea". Thus, He suggested checking online under Yahoo search, image tab. As the page starts loading, I'm a little disgusted as that is not something I would like to look "deep" into. However, I'm not going to tell you what that is. You just have to do the same thing like I do. Go online and search.

Other than that, it’s a same old day. Woke up at 5.30am, catching my company bus, having the same $1.85 lunch, reading the novel, The Fifth Mountain by Paulo Coelho. I'll share it with you once I've finished as all his books are extremely philosophical. I always try to find different sources to stimulate my brain. I better wake up and do something with my life now...

Searching for a whole new meaning...

Feeling lethargic after watching ANTM, actually to be truthful, I'm lost and confused. Apparently, watching ANTM doesn’t help me to relax a bit as the competition took place in my favorite city, Bangkok, Thailand. I reminisce the days I was in Bangkok, amazingly emancipated and all inspiring by the surroundings. After coming back from my Bangkok trip, I haven't fully recovered from my jetlag. You see, I've always experience a kind of emptiness after traveling from one place. I question my purpose in this world and worst what I have done with my life. Looking for motivation and a new direction, I begin to seek my enlightenment from Madonna latest single, Jump. In her lyrics, she mentioned:

I’m not afraid what I’ll face, but I’m afraid to stay
Going down my own road and I can make it alone
I'll work it and fight it and find a place of my own

Currently, I'm contemplating whether to quit my job in Coca-Cola and go to the next. As Madonna sings "There’s only so much you can learn in one place, The more that I wait, the more time that I waste" No matter what happen, I have to keep moving on and don't stop. I have already reached this far, I've worked in Brunei for nearly a year; I've experienced a law suit and failure. I've suffered the abuse and delay for two years in my National Service. There is really nothing I can't endure. I just need a new direction and reinvent myself for this coming 2007…

I deserve to be Happy!

Till to some unfortunate misunderstandings and encouragement from my chum, Jeannie, I decided to pick up my keyboard and type again. To start off my first blog, I decided to post myself a question: What makes me happy?

Here’s just a sampling of my happy list: loving what I do for a living (Although not at all times but I still love designing), going for a run all plugged in to my mp3 player (full of Madonna’s dance tracks), Oranges (the zest from my hand peeled oranges revitalize me), Watching anything related to Julia Roberts from movie to interview (my ultimate favorite will be Pretty Woman, My Best Friend’s Wedding and Erin Brockovich), hearing my mother laughing out loud watching her TV (we both share the same unrestraint and rambunctious way of laughing out loud) The list could go on and on, and I feel blessed to be able to say that.

We think about happiness and how to be happy a lot and maybe not at all times as survey have shown that man think about SEX 91% all the times. However, instead of looking at the small little actions that we carry out, I decided to give it a closer look, trying to examine what lies behind the happy things that we do. The essence of Happiness, to understand what it is that makes us feel content on a basic psychological level. Turns out happiness doesn’t come from any single trait or success but rather a collection of qualities and life experiences. “Real happiness comes from inside. Meaning that if you want enduring satisfaction, you have to maintain a mind set that allows you to always look for small miracle” reveals Dan Baker, Ph.D., coauthor of What Happy People Know.

Happiness is not measured by smile; it’s a state of mind. You don’t have to be perpetually chippering to be happy. What you need is optimism, altruism, be easily contented, a purpose in your life, stay grateful and self-depreciating humor will get you a long way. Forget about dieting or breast implant, if you’re not happy with yourself, you’ll never be happy.

My name is Kyle, I deserve to be happy and so do you.

P/S: I delicate this blog to my beloved chum, Jeannie. Wishing her all the happiness in the world.