As a designer, what life can I design for myself?

The Cursor Blinks: What Do I Want to Create… Just for Me?

I design many things—logos, signage, websites, and just about anything imaginable. I bring ideas to life, ensuring every element is intentional and purposeful. But when I step back, I wonder—why is it that I can design for clients with precision and vision, yet struggle to design the life I want to live? Especially coming out from my PEG operation and readjusting my new lifestyle as a disabled person unable to eat, I lost a few kgs and definitely was lost for a few months. I kept going with the excuse, I'm healing, but there is so much I wanted to do. The struggle wasn’t just about finding time; it was about finding meaning.

As a designer, I know that great design doesn’t happen by accident—it requires intention. So, I ask myself: Am I intentionally designing the life I truly want to live? If not, what’s stopping me?

Life embedded with Dharma

As a designer, I know a rigid template cracks under real life — just like in Canva. Buddhism reminds us we’re not working with static artboards, but living compositions that keep iterating. I don’t force a layout to obey; I observe its edges, kern its tensions, and compose with intention.

Just as a designer dismantles, reimagines, and reconstructs, a Buddhist approach to self-discovery follows a similar pattern. Let’s explore the journey through four core steps, inspired by both design thinking and Buddhist philosophy.

1. Deconstruction: Breaking Preconceptions

The first step in design is to break things down—strip away unnecessary elements to find the essence. In Buddhism, this aligns with the practice of impermanence (Anicca). We often build our lives around fixed identities: “I am a designer,” “I am a 46 year old man,” “I am sick.” But these labels are illusions.

When we let go of rigid self-definitions, we open up new possibilities. Ask yourself: What assumptions have I made about who I must be? Question everything — just as a designer questions whether a layout truly serves its purpose. By breaking down these mental structures, you clear the canvas for something new.

“Be like water, my friend.”  —  Bruce Lee

2. Reframing: Seeing with Fresh Eyes

A great designer doesn’t just see things; they see through things. They ask: What is the message? What is the emotion? In Buddhism, this is the practice of mindfulness (Sati). Instead of clinging to habitual perspectives, we step back and witness life as it is, not as we assume it to be.

Imagine looking at your daily routine with fresh eyes. Instead of seeing obligations, what if you saw opportunities for presence? Instead of seeing constraints, what if you saw the way out to creative freedom? The world remains the same, but the way you experience it shifts.

3. Reconstruction: Applying New Perspectives

Once we deconstruct and gain new perspectives, it’s time to apply them. In design, this is where the magic happens — ideas take form, layouts come together, and the vision is refined. In Buddhism, this step mirrors the path of transformation (Magga), where wisdom is integrated into daily life.

Perhaps you realize that your definition of success needs revising. Maybe you see that your time isn’t spent in alignment with what truly fulfills you. Now is the moment to rebuild, not by forcing, but by allowing new insights to shape your actions naturally.

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” — Aristotle

4. Expression: Living with Balance and Flow

In the final stage, a designer polishes their work—not for rigid perfection, but for resonant clarity. In Buddhism, this becomes Metta in motion: self-expression through acts that uplift others. Perhaps your masterpiece isn’t a personal portfolio piece, but the space you create for others to realize their dreams.

Life isn’t a static mockup to pixel-perfect; it’s a collaborative prototype, endlessly iterated. Creativity and spirituality aren’t final renders—they’re the process of showing up, toolset in hand:

Design for others’ joy (Your compassion as their creative director)

Leave margin for edits (The Dharma of imperfect drafts)

Export without overworking (Shipping > endless tweaking)

The purpose? Not to ‘finish’ yourself, but to keep co-creating a world where every being’s vision gets a chance to load."

For designers who’ve felt their worth hinges on deliverables, when their true medium is human connection.

You’re not the sole author here. You’re a contributor to humanity’s open-source project.

It's always there within you

Buddhism teaches that everything you need to awaken is already within you. You do not need to seek perfection, only presence. As a designer, you understand that no design is ever final—it evolves, adapts, and transforms. So does your life.

The question is not What is my true path? but How can I embrace the unfolding of my journey with curiosity and intention?

Let go of the need to control, and instead, design with an open heart. The life you truly want is not somewhere in the future — it’s right here, waiting to be created, one mindful decision at a time.

I will continue doing what I have always done, but with a different approach and necessary adjustments. I am embracing my evolution as both a designer and a person, allowing my creativity to flow in new, uncharted ways.

I will continue to travel more, write more, and build a meaningful life by publishing books that matter and visiting Buddhist sites.

And last but not least, I will continue to find meaning as I go with the Rainbodhi Singapore, serving the LGBTQ Buddhist community. To mark this transformation, I will celebrate Vesak in Seoul — the pact I made to myself since 2022. This is my way of honoring my path, my resilience, and my ever-unfolding design of life.